Three more days

Song of the day: "Freebird" Lynnard Skynnard.

Quote of the day: "It is a question of mind over matter, If you don't mind then it doesn't matter" Albert Einstein or Mark Twain, LOL, I can't remember who said it!! But I will Google it later.

It has rained and poured the better part of all fricken day here. While I was just outside feeding the horses, the sun peeped out and cast an eerie glow to everything. I got chills up and down my back and thought that this is what a pre-tornado looks like, this freakish green/yellow! But then, it is 7 something, the grass turned green and everything is busting into bloom, I would say it is more… almost dusk and a ray of hope reverberating off the green and clouds. HARD to say. No tornados, LOL, I got three days until vacation!!!!

Everyone in the house is walking on nails! There are things to pack, there are legs to shave, (Yes WOWIE gonna shave the legs and pits, maybe even wax the bikini line). Worse, there is laundry to do, house cleaning to do, dogs to wash, horses to sell… UUUUUGGGGHHHHHA.

OK. Really I got to do laundry and pack. Then pack the car. I can't pack the car until Tuesday night or at least after school and I have to remember to get Ice on the way home.

I slept last night, which was the first solid night's sleep I have gotten sense I left Doc in Tennessee back on the 21^st. But I believe that my sleep was induced by the Xanax I broke down and took. I reckon it bothered me more than I thought it would, Molly's result that is. I was prepared for this but then when I heard it, read it, and then had to recite it to Brian… It sunk in. I was OK about it when I told Sue and Harry. I was OK when I put the blog up.

It was really when I told Brian that it hit me. I was cooking dinner (BLT's for the adults and Bacon and scrambled eggs for the rug runts) and talking to Brian. He was systolic about it. I reckon I expected him to react. I expected something other then what I got.

This is not a genetic improbability. Not from my family anyway. I firmly believe that this comes from her immunization shots and is a form of heavy metal poisoning from them. The only mental health disorders in my family are from Ginger and she gets it from her biological dad, who is not pissing in the family gene pool other then the three kids he had with Mary.

My grandmother (on my mother's side) did fight a bought of depression when my grandfather dropped dead suddenly and unexpectedly. Gram never remarried, never cried about it, and never had any social interactions to speak of after it. She spent months in a darkened room and wearing black in mourning. But then and again, you did mourn (in black) for a pre-determined amount of time, in her generation when things like this happened. But she was not psychotic or anything, just mourning. She did choose to not date again because she felt it was a violation of the love she held for my grandfather.

My mother on the other hand is insane. I love her, don't get me wrong, but the 70's did something to her and her resistance for life. DRUGS. LOL. OK so she is crazy but it is a drug and drink induced thing. If she is mental health then it is because of her addictive personality. OH WELL. None of these things are Autistic or in the family of.

My mother says that my father was bi-polar. But other members of my family that knew him say it is not true. I have never met my biological father so I don't know. And his parents have passed on. All efforts to reach his half brothers and sisters go to the wayside as no one is interested in this part of Roger's life.

And I did not point my finger at Brian and say, "she got it from you or your side of the family." But there is a possibility that she got some from his family as he (after researching Autism et al) does present some traits of Autism. Like being anal retentive! LOL. Anyway, I don't think there is any finger pointing to be made. It is what it is and it did not start until she had her shots at 18 months of age.

In other news, extreme skier Shane McConkey passed away yesterday in Italy. It appears he is a victim of a jump that went wrong and he was filming a movie when it happened. Shane paved the way for extreme sports. He was 39 and is survived by his wife Sherry and 3 year old daughter Ayla.

Last week we lost Natasha Richardson on March 18^th 2009. She was also taken by a ski accident. She is survived by Liam Neeson and their two sons Micheal and Daniel. She was a beautiful contribution to the film world.

I mentioned these two (and I normally don't blog about the death of famous people) because they are (in their deaths) raising awareness of head injuries and what needs to be done to treat them or prevent them.