Bubble Wrap shortage

Bark on bubble wrap tree’s turns up missing. Read all about it! Read it here first! No, really. I received a package in the mail the other day and opened it. Only to have to search through 15 yards of bubble wrap for my prize. Which really stuck me as a waste of bubble wrap because neither of the items I bought were "fragile".

In my minds eye this is what I see. The trees in the garden at the local loony bin are no longer padded. They have been raped of their unique bubble wrap surface to protect my packages. So, now if the inmates (is that what they call the people that reside in mental institutions?) nut up and go bouncing off the tree’s they might actually harm themselves.